Tag: Self Improvement

Posted in Content, Humor, Ideas, Life, satire, tips

Public Service Announcement

Posted on by Kylie

Articles are meant to share information, tips, and opinions. This one is important to my heart. It is a list of the items I think should be made to be common sense knowledge at a minimum.

Teach it in school, teach it at home, blare it from loudspeakers in North Korea, and replace all media ads with it. I don’t anyone to be able to claim ignorance anymore. We are all put on this Earth for a reason and I know what mine is.

Best case scenario, this would become criminal activity. I have about 18 laws I will recommend we take off the books if we can have these in their stead.

Kylie’s Public Service Announcements

1st offense — Warning

2nd offense — Life in prison

Backpack

You, good sir, are not a backpack. So, kindly remove yourself from being one millimeter from me while we are standing in line at the gas station. Standing closer to me won’t get me done with my transaction any faster.

I do not like feeling your breath on my shoulder. “I beg your pardon, Sir. Please remove your breath from my neck and fuck off a few feet back.”

Even with the pandemic and the six feet away rule in place, it does not stop some people. These people are primarily at the gas station and Wal-Mart for some reason.

Holding The Door

Look, I am from Georgia and no one appreciates a gentleman more than us. But if I’m 500 yards away in the gas station parking lot, please do not hold the door for me. I do not want to do an awkward run/walk across the parking lot. Then you will not be standing there holding the door for five minutes straight.

We all appreciate what you’re trying to do. God sees you and we all see you. Just cut it out, though. I am not trying to run.

Hygiene

For god’s sake, please brush your teeth and bathe. Dousing yourself in cologne does not count as bathing.

Some of us can still smell so please have pity. If you are not sure if you smell or not, ask yourself when was the last good scrubbing you had. Or ask a friend or a family member to tell you.

Lady with cardigan with her head bent and hair astray.
Photo by DANNY G on Unsplash

Cardigan

Just because I like to wear a cardigan does not mean I am a librarian. I work on the south side of my town and apparently they equate every white person in a sweater as a librarian. Make no mistake, my street CRED is unparalleled.

Cardigans are amazing. If you are hot, you can take it off. If you are cold, you can put it on. You can buy one in every color to go with every shirt that you own. Stop the hate against cardigans.

And also, calling someone a librarian is not an insult. There’s no shame in being smart or appearing to be smart. I just don’t like the ignorance of cardigan shaming.

Lottery

For the love of all that is holy, please play your damn lottery during working hours. Not right before work starts or right after work ends. We have jobs to get to and don’t have time for you to pick eight number sevens, five number threes, and eight number twos.

And please tell me how the hell you manage to have the money to play the lottery every day when you don’t, apparently, go to work. I’m talking to you, weird creepy guy that hits on me every day at the gas station.

Get a job. The chance of you getting rich is much higher that way. The chance of you scoring at the gas station is much higher that way as well.

A scratch off lotto ticket on a table.
Photo by Emiliano Vittoriosi on Unsplash

Messenger

I have touched on this before. It’s still an issue. Facebook messenger was not invented for the sole purpose of harassing women on the internet. At least I don’t think it was.

Regardless, it is absolutely the most annoying thing that has ever happened. Even though I find some small pleasure in rebutting the advances of said weirdos, I wish they would just stop already.

I’m sure there are women that have used this for that as well, but I have never heard of one in my life or from someone I know. Just last week I had a man asking me to use him financially, no strings attached. Now if I was a younger, dumber version of myself, I might’ve fallen for that.

I’m 41. I know there’s no such thing as no strings attached. So, sorry Buddy, you’ll have to spend your paycheck on yourself or some other lady that believes you will leave her alone and just hand her the money.

These are just some of the most urgent items I must fix as your new leader. I mean, someone should do something about these issues.

So call upon Congress or write me in for the next election. The choice is yours.

Posted in Life

Empty Nest Syndrome

Posted on by Kylie
Empty Nest Syndrome
Canva

My children will be all raised and gone from my house before I know it. I will be left behind with their memorable words, dirty handprints, and toddler images rooted in my mind. My brain understands this, but my heart does not! My identity will be carried off with them.

These children have been the focal point of my life for the last twenty years. At times, they have been the only thing standing between me and insanity. They have been my anchors when my life was adrift. I poured all of the best parts of me into raising them and I have never been prouder of anything else. They are the best and only achievements that matter to me.

My oldest daughter has flown the coop already. She has not looked back either. Although I miss her terribly, I know she is smart and self-sufficient.

My boys, however, don’t inspire much confidence in self-sufficiency. Even so, my eighteen-year-old son is counting down the days until he can spread his wings. I can’t fault him. I was the same way.

The problem is that I still look at them and see the two toe-headed little toddlers that they once were. The ones that constantly brought mischief, excitement, and exhaustion into my life. The ones that taught me how to be a mother and truly love someone.

However able they may be, it is still excruciating for me to sit by and watch them make mistakes I see coming a mile away. They ignore what I know is a red flag and just assume I am an old lady who doesn’t know what she is talking about. After all, my experiences were from the “olden days” and these are new times. So, I shut my mouth and sit back.

The Plan

I still have two young left to finish mothering so that will keep me in check for the next eight years. But after that, I can already see that I’m going to have a hard time figuring out who I am other than a mother.

I have a career, hobbies, and a husband, but they all take a backseat to motherhood. I have dogs, birds, and a turtle to use my motherly instincts on as well. But I can foresee that it won’t be enough for me.

My plan of action for the inevitable empty nest syndrome is to continue to improve myself and work on finding a passion beyond writing and mothering. I need to strengthen other relationships so I can lean on that love while the other leaves me temporarily.

I also plan to adopt six more dogs, but don’t tell my husband. I did some research on how the “experts” say we should prepare for empty nest syndrome. No one can say that I am not preparing for this upcoming disruption in my life.

The Research

The Mayo Clinic says to prevent being afflicted with empty nest syndrome you must accept the fact your kids are leaving, keep in touch with them when they go, seek support from friends and family, and to stay positive.

The experts at Wikipedia note that you should stay in touch with people, get invested in a new hobby, or rekindle your relationship with your spouse should you be so inclined.

Good Housekeeping, in my opinion, gives the best advice. They say for you to figure out who you are as an individual, make a plan of action to stay in contact with the nest flyers, structure your days to stay busy, and to find new pleasures in life.

In the meantime, I will focus on enjoying the time I have left with them. And since I’m fretting so far in advance, maybe I’ll try to wean myself from my mothering dependency. This whole time they thought they needed me, but I needed them more.

Posted in Humor, Life, Social Media, tips

Do You Want To Stop Someone’s Whining On Facebook?

Posted on by Kylie
Stop Facebook Whining
Made with Canva

Her posts were filled with self-pity, memes reflecting the character of strong women, pleas to the ones that got away, and cringe worthy desperation. — Kylie

I speak for the nation when I say, “Please stop your incessant whining on Facebook. We also don’t want to see a picture of your tears, your empty bed, or your cleavage.”

I can’t unfriend her or look away, try as I might. Might someone be more cringeworthy than me? Suddenly my obviously finding myself hysterical didn’t seem so bad to this odd mix of self-pity, love of her own eyes, and selfies. Her beautiful children would be featured every now and then, but normally were overshadowed by her fixation on finding her true love.

I have never wanted to bitch slap somebody more in my entire life. Then I realized, how was I doing anything but hurting her by continuing to watch this without saying something? I was being a mean girl, and that is not who I am.

So, I called her. I told her how she was coming across and she genuinely seem to not realize that. She admitted to wondering why she lost so many friends online recently. It made an immediate difference in her online persona.

So, instead of talking about her behind her back consistently, I went to her directly with the issue. Now, she’s in a better place and, unfortunately, I’m out of dramatics to watch unfold on Facebook. My husband is being a shit right now so maybe people are watching me and my passive aggressive posts and talking shit.

I just hope that is not my entire fifteen minutes of fame.I’m sure I will humiliate myself for another 15 minutes of fame somewhere along this road of life I travel.

Posted in Humor

Doomsday Prepping 101: Post COVID Disaster Tips

Posted on by Kylie

The COVID-19, also know as the Coronavirus, pandemic will not be forgotten by any of us any time soon. It has wrecked havoc on my life from getting my wedding venue and honeymoon cancelled the day before my wedding to ruining my son’s baseball career. That was just the beginning of the nightmare we were all about to endure. A nightmare that seems to have no ending in sight.

I will be the first to admit that I used to tease and make fun of the zombie apocalypse, end of the world obsessed people. They would all watch that violent show on AMC and then really believe that stuff would happen. Not only that, but, they believed it would happen soon. I also spared no ridicule for the doomsday preppers with their bunkers and massive collections of canned goods. I’m not laughing anymore.

I took a good and hard look at myself during this virus and found myself to be seriously lacking. My survival skills, on a scale from one to ten, were at a negative twenty. I had no stores of canned goods or bottled water. And, even worse, I had never even thought about toilet paper being the first essential item to all but disappear. I was totally unprepared. That will not be me the next time this happens.

I will be locked, loaded, and ready from now on.

The TP

When shit hit the fan, I was not surprised to see evidence of hoarding start to happen. Much like when southerners see a snowflake, the supermarkets started getting low on certain items, mainly milk and bread. That was normal. This time, instead of bread and milk, the people panicked and bought all available toilet paper. This was not normal.

Months later, I am still confused by this. I bought bottled water and canned food. My butt was the last thing on my mind at the time. You can’t eat toilet paper for survival, but you can wipe your butt across the yard.

A lesson was learned this year. During these last few months of chaos, I have had to borrow toilet paper and, once, had to drive two hours to my brother’s house to find some. I will never let my toilet paper supply dwindle down again.

Reading

There have been a few good things to come out of all of this. I have always been a book hoarder, both paper and digital, but now I can hoard them with no backtalk from my husband! He now understands we might need these to fully educate all of our offspring in the future. I hope they like Stephen King and Ken Follett.

I might be taking advantage of this situation a little, but he has also stockpiled a few unnecessary items. Nobody needs that many tree stands.

Alcohol

This might not seem essential to some. Tell me that after trying to homeschool six kids and work a full time job. Retraction: Tell me that after trying to homeschool MY six kids and work MY full time job. I will make sure plenty of wine is on hand from now on, no matter what. I will use whatever methods I can find to prevent being defeated by my life. If I have to learn how to make my own shine myself deep in the woods somewhere, then so be it. My grandfather did it and he was not the sharpest tool in the shed. Probably because of his moonshine.

Tip: some types of alcohol can also be used to make hand sanitizer supposedly.

Back to the homeschooling debacle. I can not begin to describe the trauma this home schooling stunt has caused me or the learning disabilities it has caused my kids. School is on track to reopen very soon here and I have never been more terrified to send my kids back there. It feels like I’m sending them straight to COVID.

I am leaning towards making them stay home. I would rather have them dumb, but alive. Of course, they want to go back to school and life as normal as soon as they possibly can, so I have not discussed this with them yet. I keep hoping the schools will delay things a little longer.

Gardening

I started gardening after all of this in preparation for the next global pandemic or food shortage caused by fear mongering. I know now that I need to know more survival, cooking, and gardening skills if I expect to survive the hunger games.

However, if we should actually ever drop down to a short supply of food, my husband is an expert hunter and fisherman. For those of you that are not so lucky, I would recommend starting a garden or considering taking a course on how to loot. You can just go back and watch some old episodes of CNN for the looting lesson. I wouldn’t recommend coming to my house, though.

As I work on myself and the new life that has suddenly become mine, I try to be optimistic and positive outwardly. Inside, I am patiently waiting for my life to get back to normal. Deep down, I think we all will be learning a new normal. Life from before is over.

Posted in Content, Ideas, tips, writing

5 Ways To Find Fresh Content Ideas

Posted on by Kylie
Canva

I have been writing forever, but only a few months here on this platform. I have noticed a trend in articles about monthly earnings and content generation. And by a trend, I mean everyone is copying that one guy.

With that being noted, I have nothing much to contribute in regards to the earnings, so I will share some of the ways I come up with ideas.

Pinterest

Pinterest should just change its name to contact board because so many ideas are available right there for your grabbing. I’ll look in the today, following, and for you sections for inspiration.

Pinterest is also a great place to do research for articles that you might be playing around with in your head. It will need to be fact checked for sure, though.

Newsletter

Another good thing to use for ideas are newsletters that may come to your email. That’s why I sign up for as many as possible. My Apple newsletter is especially helpful in keeping up with current events. Reading another blog might stimulate an idea as well

I also like reading newsletters so I can know the minds of my competitors and, in one case, the super arrogant man I am determined to defeat on Medium.

Surroundings

I have used my surroundings many times to spark my creativity. I have used music, conversations, and scenery. My family, my experiences, and my extremely regular failures have also played a part in many of my musings. My amazing street cred, collection of hotel soaps,and former life as a gypsy fortune teller have also provided me with plenty to offer in my writings.

News

The news is full of current events, made up completely events, and past events that have been twisted to fit today’s agenda. You can take all of this garbage and put your own spin on it.

If nothing stimulates you or catches your fancy, just pretend something happened. Then write about it and maybe you can cause a viral or global panic. Fingers crossed.

My Sister

Not your sister, my sister. That’s right. I am offering her up for you to write about. There are so many things she does and qualities she’s missing as a human, that you will be ruminating for days on the possibilities.

That is the beauty of writing. There are so many common topics, but you don’t ever get the same exact opinions twice. Every writer has his or her own unique voice to lend to the situation. Even some morons that I’m tired of hearing from. Even politicians if they have had a few drinks.

Posted in Humor, Life, tips

9 Ways To Build A Life Worth Living

Posted on by Kylie
Canva

I woke up in my forties and found myself adrift in a sea of yoga pants, identical personalities, and uninspired activities. Everything and everyone I encountered was interchangeable, bland, and boring. I decided I would never let that happen to me.

So, I took a good look at the people I was around on a consistent basis and noticed that they all were content but unenthusiastic and unmotivated. None of them were striving for more or continuing to grow in any way that I could see. Every day was the same as the one before it.

People that I formerly knew as outspoken leaders were now sharing the same opinions and beliefs as their spouses without knowing why. So much so, that they began to almost look-alike in addition to also sharing the same thoughts.

Two sheep on a grassy area.
Robinson Recalde on Unsplash

I thought and pondered on this for weeks. I heard people who spouted their opinions straight from Fox or CNN, talk about brainwashed individuals. They could not see the irony.

I could see the authenticity had left them somewhere along their way. I wanted to make sure I never lost myself. I didn’t know how to prevent it though. Then I thought about what made me different than them.

Read

I constantly read from almost every genre. I believe that this keeps my brain healthy and is one of the reasons I am a critical thinker. I have always been a person to ask questions. I want to know why things happen. I want to know how things are done. And most importantly, I don’t offer an opinion on something I’m not educated about.

Try new things

Growth is about allowing yourself to evolve. I aim to learn something new every day, whether it is from another person, a lesson from something dumb I did, or from reading an article.

I also make it a habit to try new activities and go to new places as often as I can. In the last month, I have started shooting a bow, making mosaics, and started growing my own vegetables. Even if I hate it, at least I can say I tried.

A camera on a ledge with the sky in the background.
Clay Banks on Unsplash

Teach

There is not a person alive that does not have insights or experiences to share with another. We are meant to pass our lessons on. At a minimum, share your experiences with your children and family as a legacy for them to have forever.

Give

Religion did not teach me this, but I live my life as a servant to others. Serving and giving are the two things that I get the most reward out of doing. I love seeing the downtrodden realize that someone cares or the shunned know that someone will stand up for them.

Give without expecting anything in return, but the feeling you are rewarded with. It is more than enough.

Woman falling off a ledge reaching out to a hand held out to help her.
Noah Bücher on Unsplash

Laugh

The theme of my life has been and always will be laughter. I think my best quality is being able to find something to laugh and joke about on an almost constant basis. I don’t understand people that take themselves so seriously. Lighten the f*&k up. We only get one life, or so I’m told.

Be Yourself

Whoever that you believe created this world did not put you here to be a replica of everyone else. I am completely original, and so are you. Stop trying to fit in and love who you are!

The world needs more people to push boundaries and defy the ordinary. That could be you if you stopped being a sell-out.

Have a creative outlet

I am considered to be a stoic person by certain members of my family. I don’t get overly emotional outwardly. But, despite what many think, I do have feelings and care deeply about plenty. I’m just awkward as hell at showing it.

Years ago, my former therapist recommended I take up a creative hobby as an outlet for my feelings. I don’t know if writing, making mosaics, or painting is getting the brunt of my emotions, but I do enjoy doing it.

It really does help me relax or calm down when I lose my cool, or I’m stressed out more than usual.

Reduce Stress

Being a walking ball of anxiety, I have a hard time with this even though I try hard to do it. Relaxing is something that has never come easy for me. I don’t watch TV, and I am usually running around working, parenting, or cleaning. When I do sit down, I fall asleep almost instantly.

With that being said, I have tried mediation, mindful breathing, stress exercises, drinking, and much more to reduce my stress levels. I haven’t found anything that worked much for me, but I am still optimistic. If I ever find a way to relax, I will really feel like I’ve made it in this world.

An image of a man standing on a rock with arms outspread in front of a sunset.
Xan Griffin on Unsplash

Buy Less/Do More

You will, most likely, never regret an experience with a loved one, but you will consistently regret material purchases. When faced with the choice of an item or an experience, always choose the experience. Memories will be the only thing you take with you when you pass on.

Most importantly, as I have recently learned the hard way, Memories are the only things left behind for us as well. Treasure the moments you are making them.