Posted in Ideas, Life, life lessons, love, Marriage, Relationships, tips

Ways To Find A Person Worthy Of Your Love

How I met an amazing man after two awful marriages

A young couple enjoying romance and true love on a beautiful beach.
Art By Author using www.canva.com

After two horrible marriages, I was absolutely determined never to fall in love again. My heart was battered and bruised and I had my children to raise alone. I was also financially devastated since neither one of my husbands had ever opted to pay child-support.

People with similar values, lifestyles, and goals will find each other. It is as if our hearts are radars that search each other out in the dark. This works for the bad as well, I would think.As much as this is true, it is hard to find people that have the same exact beliefs as someone else does. It is even harder to find someone that is worthy of your love. It seems to get harder the older you get. Or maybe you just put up with less.

After dating and marrying two men that could not have been much worse for me, I finally found a love worthy of my heart. I just got remarried for the third and final time. I found a man that treats me like a Queen. He puts up with enormous amounts of my shenanigans. He is everything that I never thought really existed. He is stable and responsible. He is the peace to my flame.

I was not looking for love. I wasn’t trying to find him or anyone else. I was not dating at all. I was focusing on myself, my children, and my future after a traumatizing second marriage. It turns out things can go from bad to worse, as I learned in that second marriage.

People ask me all the time how I got so lucky to meet such a good man. They obviously don’t know about my first marriage or my second. This made me think about what I had done differently this time. I also took a closer look at some of the other people I knew that were lucky enough to find true love.

Social events can serve a purpose

As for my happy ending, I met my amazing husband through my neighbor at a cookout. My neighbor had been trying for a while to set me up with this friend of his, but I just wasn’t interested in dating at the time. I actually had no intentions of ever dating again much less getting married.

I went to the cookout, at my next door neighbor’s house, more out of boredom than anything. I knew some friends would be there and needed an excuse to socialize with some wine. Suddenly, my neighbor walks up alongside this tall man and I knew instantly what was going on. I was not interested, but I wasn’t rude. We chatted for a moment and then it was time to eat. He wandered inside to get his plate.

A few minutes later, he reappeared and I was shocked to see that he had made me a plate and had brought it to me along with a chair. He had even buttered my corn. Fast forward to now. We are married, I am madly in love, and we still say he won me by buttering my corn.

Not all people online are creeps

Believe it or not, two of my favorite married couples both met on Match.com. This really surprised me. I had always thought online dating or apps like Tinder were for just hook ups. I was wrong. I was told most people that are serious about finding love go to the paid sites. The people that are just looking for hook ups go to the free sites such as Tinder. Don’t kill the messenger, that’s just what I was told.

Schools and dog parks have plenty of similarities

90% of the couples I questioned met in school. They either met in high school or in their college years. They all have been together ever since. Personally, I am glad I did not meet my soul mate that early because I was able to have a little bit of fun before my life turned into a total disaster.

One couple I interviewed met at a dog park. Their dogs actually connected first. This is my favorite story of the people I asked. It reminds me of something straight out of a romantic comedy. Once they started talking, they bonded immediately and exchanged phone numbers. He called her that night. They have seen each other every day since then. Only six months later, they were engaged. Eighteen months later, they were married. And ten years later, they are still married.

Weddings don’t have to suck

Going to a wedding does not always have to be awful and soul crushing. One couple that I questioned met at a wedding of a mutual friend. They both contemplated seriously not attending. They are still astounded about how one tiny decision affected their entire life and how close they came to missing it. Remember that the next time you are sitting in your underwear, eating a bag of chips and thinking about skipping that invitation.

It seems to me that the happiest couples found love when they were not looking. They were happy and satisfied with their lives alone. And then, right when they least expected it, the right person came into their lives.

Be kind to others, work on improving yourself and be open to trying new experiences. You just may find the love you have given up on.


This made me curious though. I knew that I played a part in my meeting of them in before him. I was determined that I would do things differently after those marriages, but I never got around to that.I started looking at my group of friends that were married or in love. I asked the seemingly happiest couples about the circumstances surrounding their meetings.

Posted in Humor, WTF

3 Strange Opinions I Hide That Are Guaranteed To Offend

How are these opinions not obviously correct?

Former pinions guaranteed to offend somebody
Canva by Author


Opinions are like anuses; everybody has one. But my husband has banned me from bringing them up online or at parties. I really have no choice other than to bring these strange opinions up now, and then it will be out of my system. Please note that these are my opinions so I am not looking to argue. That is what Facebook is for.

News

I hear people talking crap about the propaganda that is spilled out of North Korea on a daily basis. Or China’s propaganda or Japan’s. The same people then sit down and watch our news for 10 to 12 hours straight. How do they not see that the news is our own propaganda? We are handed propaganda at every turn churches or news or media.

The American media has always had an agenda. They are a conglomerate capable of much more than what they actually do. They show only what they want to be seen and tell only what they want to tell.

What if, instead of inciting and dividing, they unified us as a people? Why do they divide us? Are the powers that be scared of a unified people? Hence the saying, divide and conquer?

Two of the animals that didn’t fit on a boat someone built for every species.
Photo by James Lee on Unsplash

Noah’s Ark

I’m sorry in advance. No one, even the best boat builder around, could build a boat big enough to fit all the species in it. And then, he supposedly did it in his backyard. I stand by my argument that this story is a fable or parable and not a fact. Logic should support me on this. I will not pull out measurements to show this is not feasible.

Racism is real

Racism is real. White privilege is real. It doesn’t mean all lives don’t matter. It means all lives do matter, including black ones. It doesn’t mean we have to keep living like that. We can all come together and implement changes to change things. It will take a while, but all good and worthy things do.Be the change you want to see. But, first, you have to open your eyes.


Posted in credit repair, Debt, Finance, Life, money

Paying Off Debt Quickly Using The Snowball Method

Using this method, paying off debt can be done with fast results and skyrocketing credit scores

A lady exasperated by her debt, trying to figure out how to pay it all
Canva

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.

-Aristotle

A debt snowball is not a crumpled up wad of bills for you to throw around in the snow. It is a debt reducing strategy that I learned from financial guru, Dave Ramsey. I have tried almost every financial strategy in existence and this one is the one I recommend to my financial or credit analysis clients.

Using this method, paying off debt can be done a little at a time for faster results and skyrocketing credit scores.

Step 1

Add up all of your debt and allocate them into categories such as credit cards, medical, collections, loans, etc. Then further allocate them by the ones with the highest interest rate down to the lowest. Use the method on each section or, if you can only do one at a time, start with the debt that has interest on it.

Step 2

Pay the minimum payment due on all except the one with the smallest balance or the highest interest rate. I would recommend sorting first by interest rate and then by balance to save the most money in the long run. However you decide to do it, pick the one to pay as much over the minimum payment as you can afford.

Repeat until the first debt is paid off in full.

Step 3

Repeat the first two steps over and over with the remaining debt until everything is paid off and you are one of the rare, debt-free individuals that we hear about so often.

After that final debt is cleared, you will be amazed how fast things got better for you financially and regretful for how long it took you to do it. Suddenly, you’ll be in the position to buy something that you need when you need it and use cash. Being debt free is an amazing feeling to have especially if you have almost drowned from it before.


That doesn’t sound like a big deal to some people, but I know many, many people who pray for only that circumstance to happen in their lives before they die. They just want a chance to not worry constantly about making ends meet for a few moments in their life before it’s over.

I am a definite realist and true unbeliever in fairy tales. So, please believe me when I tell you that this goal is attainable for everyone. Anyone willing to put in the work can make this happen. As with anything else, small changes and/or steps done on a consistent basis will quickly lead to great accomplishments.

My favorite financial quote has always been, “It is not how much money you earn, but how much you don’t spend that determines your wealth.” It is also a quote that I have heard from my brother 1 million times so it has stuck in my head. Which reinforces my point that anything we do repeatedly becomes an action.

Posted in Family, Humor, Life, life lessons, Satire

A Tragic Breast Story

The story of when my Aunt’s nipple fell off

My family has extremely bad luck, but most of us have two nipples

Canva

I never thought I’d write about my Aunt’s nipple. At least, I’m not writing about my Uncle’s testicles. Yet.

This story has been passed around more than my high school best friend since this incident happened. People at bars have heard it. People at church have heard about it. I created a children’s book about it and read about it to my son’s kindergarten class. OK, well, maybe I didn’t do that. Yet.

I will preface this story by saying that my Aunt, my Mother’s sister, was very sexually active back in her day. She continued to be sexually active long after her day passed, also.

Breast cancer runs in our family and has caused many tragic, untimely deaths. So, in an effort to be proactive against cancer, my Aunt had a double mastectomy. She went ahead and had reconstructive surgery soon after and had those puppies lifted and enhanced.

Fast forward a while later. This is where things get foggy. I’m not sure if it was eight weeks or eight years, but she had taken her bra off during the night and her nipple fell out of her bra onto the floor. She reportedly yelled, “Shit!” out loud.

Honestly, I don’t know what I would’ve done. I can probably say that I wouldn’t have gathered my nipple up, set it aside for the night, and worried about it the next day.

Maybe she didn’t worry about it the next day despite what she says. Because to date she still does not have a nipple on one side. Yolo, I guess.

I may be the black sheep, but there’s a herd of us in my family.




Posted in Family, Humor, Life

My Siblings Are Amazing People, Despite Being Weird

.MA loving brother and two sisters standing together.
Canva

Some would call me an accident. And by some, I mean my mother. In full disclosure though, she always said I was the best accident that she’s ever had.

My sister was 15 when I was born and my brother was 13. So I didn’t have very many years with them around before they flew from the nest with little thought to the foundling left behind. Which could be the main reason why we never learned to hate each other.

Growing up, my brother was definitely my biggest ally and caretaker. He would pull me around in a box, which in hindsight is not that great. But apparently, I loved it back then. It’s not as fun when you’re 42, though. My sister didn’t spend much time with me when I was very young because she was a social butterfly and the queen bee of our little town.

My brother married the love of his life shortly after leaving for college. He excelled in his career and still is the best husband I’ve ever seen up close. He dotes on his family. He has continuously educated himself and moved up in every aspect of his life. I am only now just beginning to understand how important it is to keep growing and learning as a person.

My sister became my best friend when I was a little older. As a teenager, I thought the sun rose and set on her. She was my hero for many years.

As adults, we have both been prone to impulsiveness and bad decisions. We both love to prank people and can be somewhat obnoxious at times. There have been many moments in my adulthood that I wouldn’t have made it through, if she hadn’t been my ally. For the most part, we are always there for each other when we need each other.

There is not another man, other than my husband, that I respect more than my brother. If more men were as good at being a husband as he always has been, this world’s divorce rate would plummet. There is not another person on this planet that can make me laugh as much as my sister can.

I don’t want to make any of this go to their heads, because it will. And my sister cannot afford that at all. I just wanted to take a moment to praise them, because all I hear about from my kids how much they hate each other. Not all of them do that, but most of them do. And if they don’t say it, it is very evident in their actions.

I know they love each other, because when any one of them is sick they will ask about the ill one behind closed doors. I guess it would be considered a sign of weakness to them, if they thought anyone knew they really cared.

I pray that they will grow out of this feeling. Other parents have assured me that they will, but I never have had ill feelings towards my siblings so I wouldn’t know about that.

I would love to post a picture of my brother and sister, but one of them is immensely private. I don’t feel right about posting one and not the other. However, I will post their Social Security numbers. Kidding…

I would really love to hear about other people’s relationships with their siblings. I would especially love to hear about siblings that grew up not liking each other, but ended up becoming really close as adults.

In this life we will never truly be apart, for we grew to the same beat of our mothers heart.

Daphne Fandrich

Posted in Content, Humor, Ideas, Life, Satire, Uncategorized, WTF

What Is Anal Bleaching?

And more importantly, why does it exist?

A firm and bleached buttocks.
Canva

I don’t care if my butthole color offends anyone. You read that correctly. Bleaching one’s butthole, aka spinchter, is now a thing.

Now, not only do we have to groom ourselves meticulously in our nether regions but we also are being pressured to bleach our anuses. Well, I guess we don’t have to. Because I’m not going to. There is no beauty standard or ideal worth much pain or effort for me at this point in my life. Much less a sudden standard about my butthole color.

What is anal bleaching?

I am so glad you asked. Butthole bleaching is the process of dying your asshole so it is lighter than the color you were born with.

Why bleach your anus?

I don’t know. You tell me. I guess there’s also self-esteem issues regarding the color of one’s sphincter. Your guess is as good as mine.

I would love to be informed if this is somehow deemed medically necessary. If I find out anyone’s insurance actually covers this, I quit. I quit everything.

The procedure

I am not ashamed to tell you that I researched this vigorously. You can buy a cream to do this yourself or you can go professional and get it done at a place that actually does sphincter bleaching. Either way, you will use a cream that is most likely cancer-causing just to make your butthole blend in with the rest of your skin.

I just want to know why this is not a disorder of some kind. Are mental health professionals not concerned?

So, if you, or someone you know, actually plans to spend their hard earned money to have their butthole bleached, please email me. I will give you my cash app info. At least that way your money will be going towards a good cause. The good cause being anything other than a butthole bleaching.

Actually, now that I’m thinking about it, if you or anyone you know, enjoys a butt bleaching, please do not let me know. That’s weird AF.