I believe that this picture is the first time I have ever had the pleasure of seeing pure bliss or ecstasy on the face of an animal.
I also adore the love coming from the face of my amazing husband. He would deny all feelings like that of course, because he is a “man.” For God’s sake, he owns both camouflage and orange clothing!
I am extremely excited to announce that I am driving a car that is less than five years old for the first time ever in my entire life.
However, the most exciting part for me is the fact that the windows roll down and the air conditioner works.
I have spent the last six months in the dead heat of Georgia summer driving around in a car with no air-conditioning and no ability to open the window. Combine that situation with the blacked out gangster tint all over the windows on this car and you have the recipe for a small compact section of Hell brought up for your own amusement.
So in simpler and less dramatic terms, I am so excited to be comfortably working my life away instead of doing it with no air conditioner in a less than stellar vehicle.
The downside to this improvement in my life is that I now have a $600 a month car payment. So, on a final note, I have become broker but cooler in a sense as well.
The COVID-19 virus and pandemic totally shook the world to its core. Everything we thought was sacred and safe all of a sudden wasn’t anymore. People started turning on each other and against the government that was failing them with each new regulation that passed.
Our work, our kids’ lives, and our social lives have all taken a huge hit. Many have lost their jobs and some have lost most, if not all, of their income. The stimulus relief provided by the government helped for a minute, but more help is drastically needed. Jobs are still being lost and companies are shutting down consistently.
Now, here we are with no end in sight. People are still out for each other’s throats online and in politics. Our governor, in Georgia, is suing for people not to be able to wear a mask. Therefore, it’s logical to assume he wants everyone to get sick.
Virus numbers continue to rise and conspiracy theories are being speculated on left and right as to the reason for this. Conspiracy theory rumors are everywhere and mistrust of the government is at an all time high. Are there really more COVID cases or are we just showing this increase as a result of having more access to testing and/or healthcare facilities? Are so many people really still dying from it or are hospitals trained to now state COVID as cause of death for everything in order to get some kind of funding or grant?
We have a local community center that provides a drive up mobile testing site for locals to go for testing at their leisure. I had a friend that went there two weeks ago and stood in line for a couple hours after registering. He finally got fed up and left. Much to his surprise, he got a letter in the mail a few days later telling him he had tested positive for COVID. He was very confused as he had no test done. His story has quickly spread in our community and his is just one of many that make us suspicious.
More and more people start hearing stories like this. The question is what would be the motive behind this? None of us can figure that out. We are just all ready for our lives and our kids lives to get back to normal. Living in fear on a daily basis has caused many of us to become desensitized to the virus.
It’s time for some answers.
The hardest thing I’ve ever had to do is to raise four kids while helping two of them deal with the loss of their father. Although we saw it coming, it was still not something they were prepared for mentally. And I was not prepared at all to help them deal with the raw emotions that grief brings. The people I loved most in the world had broken hearts and I couldn’t do anything to fix it this time. I felt helpless and didn’t know what to do.
I looked up ways to deal with it and read all about grief and its stages. I spent hours pouring over articles and requesting the advice of family and friends. At the end of the day, though, I just dealt with it as I went along and I’ve notated what seemed to work for me. Unfortunately, too many children have to grieve before they should.
Encourage children to talk about their memories and the good times that they had with the person in question. Also encourage them to talk about the bad memories. Encourage them to ask any questions they might have about the death and what led to it.
All memories are worth talking about. Talking and reliving those memories as a way to show them that keeping someone’s memory alive is one way of honoring them.
Validate any emotions that they may have whether it be anger, apathy, or sadness. Make sure that they know that there’s no shame in crying. It’s also important to let them know that there’s no one way to grieve and everyone does it differently. As for crying, it is better to let it out than to let it build up. It’s a release that needs to happen and it will happen one way or another.
Just like adults, children often feel helpless in the face of so much emotion and grief and don’t know what to do. Seeing so many grown people crying is terrifying for them. If the person that has passed away was an immediate family member, let them be a part of the funeral planning as much as they can be. Or at a minimum, let them do their own memorial that they can bring to the funeral or service such as a memory board or garden memory stone. It makes them feel like they are giving out a final gift and saying goodbye.
Some will become extra clingy and need more time with you. Others may become distant and withdrawn and need time to themselves in an isolated environment. Neither way is wrong. Encourage whichever way your child or loved one wants to grieve.
Talk about death and dying and their fears even if they don’t bring it up. Death is scary for anyone but especially terrifying for children. When they lose a parent, or anyone they’re close to, it really brings death close to home.
Your child may become obsessed with death and finding out what happens in the afterlife. Others might not want to talk about it at all but gain a sudden interest in religion.
No matter what your religion or your beliefs are, explain to them how faith helps people deal with death. I think that is the most beautiful thing about religion. It is a light in the darkness and makes it possible for you to have faith in something that you cannot see. To believe without knowing.
As with you and I, time is the best healer and it’s impossible to explain accurately that it will get better as each day goes by.
Just do the best you can each day and encourage them to do the same. Reach out to a professional if you feel at any time that your child is depressed or may need professional help. It’s especially important to teach them that there is no shame in asking for help when you need it.
I will be the first one to admit that I am weird as hell. I prefer to call it being a rare, limited edition. However you fluff it up, I love myself weird. There are enough vanilla people running the streets already! I’m so proud of how weird I am that I am going to break down all the ways that I am excessively weird. I hope somewhere a closet weirdo will read this and know they are not alone. Some of these items used to bother me but, the older I’ve gotten, the less f%^ks I have had to give.
I am not aware of how statistics work, but I can make things up just as easily as the next gal, so I’m going to state the fact that 10% of people are addicted to cocaine. I am in the 2% that are addicted to succulents. (Do you see what I did there? You can literally make up any statistics you want). Succulents are hard to kill, cacti like plants. I have a lot of them and continue to accrue them as often, or more often, as I kill them. I also talk to them. At one point, I tried to teach them Spanish. Actually, I was just practicing my skills. Not that they offered any insight.
I also have odd habits in regards to my clothing. I don’t like buying items I won’t use or get my money’s worth out of. Being extremely poor for a few years definitely helped me with money management. So, with that being said, I wear my clothes in the order that they are hung up in my closet. I start at the front. If a said item happens to be out of season (long sleeves in summer, etc.), I will hang in in the back and start the rotation again. I like to feel like I’m getting my money’s worth out of my clothing because I may or may not spend excessively in this category.
I absolutely hate the voice on my map app that I use to drive everywhere but I absolutely cannot live without it. I hate her/him/it so much that, when it tells me to take a left, I respond every time with, “No, YOU turn left! You piece of$&@?!’b ,?$& !” Or something to that effect.
I despise it when people name their dogs with a human name. I am not yelling, “Edward! Come here!” or “Jason, put that ball down!” It’s not right and I strongly feel that it should be made illegal immediately. Two good examples of perfect dog names are my dogs. The youngest mutt has the distinguished name of Baxter VonFerrell, III. My older gentleman pup is named Snoopy Donkey McDougal. We only yell out the middle name if they are in big trouble, which is the standard we all go by throughout the world, I believe.
Lastly, I would like to confess to you about my obsession with lists. I have hundreds of them on every subject you could ever imagine. I don’t remember exactly when I became a listoholic but it was within the last ten years or so. I plan to publish an article soon naming twenty or so of my favorite lists. I know I can’t be the only list obsessed person who is also, at the same time, a hugely disorganized wreck of a person. I consider all of my lists to be sacred. Reading, skimming, or even glancing at one could possibly earn you a throat punch.
So, yes, I am weird. I have the sense of humor of a twelve-year-old boy, I am obsessed with Will Ferrell, and I give out lectures like Oprah hands out everything. I am not only ok with my weirdness, but I love it. I used to try and imitate my friends and hide my weirdness by pretending to like golf and sweater vests. I got tired very quickly and stopped. They kept loving me anyway! I also gained new friends. It turned out, a lot more people accepted my personality than not. I did have a few look down at me but I think they were just hating me because I was free and they weren’t. It’s hard to feel bad for someone that is in the prison that they made for themselves.
My previous husband (current one is awesome) tried to stifle me. He succeeded for a while. He slowly robbed me of my friends and dulled my personality with verbal abuse and constant criticism. He tried to take me and turn me into a dull shell of a person. He didn’t succeed. I won then and I keep on winning.
Here is a link to another one of my life-altering, hard-hitting articles. Also, feel free to send an e-mail to kylie@kyliesells.com and I will add you to my random, unpredictable newsletters that will update you on my life and make you feel a whole lot better about yours!
You never know what ridiculous tidbit of advice I will be emailing out. Or whose name is on it or what I’m talking about!
Kylie’s Rants 